Committedly Crazy

As I wrote once before, I love to walk. Almost every day, Ezekiel and I head out on a four-mile walk. Even during the cold days of winter, we walked - as long as the temperature was above zero. I've gotten looks of disapproval from older ladies, countless offers for rides, and even made some friends on that walking path. I've been called determined and committed to my face; behind my back, I'm sure I've been called crazy and foolish. Today was probably one of those days I would be called either committed or crazy - take your pick. But at least it was just rain. And don't worry - Zeke stays warm and dry. In fact, I think he's wetter some mornings when he overflows his diaper than he is on days like today when we hit the walking path.

Today, with my hood soaked, falling over my face and making me look like some Star Wars character, I contemplated whether I was committed or crazy. And I couldn't help but wish my walk with Christ was as much of an obvious commitment as my daily physical walk is. I mean, these people I meet out on our walk, whether they are on foot themselves or in a car, they see me nearly every day. Just the other day, a woman at a garage sale told me I was her "hero" because she drove past me every day.

But is my dedication to Christ as evident?

Do I follow Jesus with such obvious commitment?
Do those I meet in the grocery store or pharmacy know that I am not living for myself?
Do I get head-shakes from others who see me living as Jesus commanded?

And following Jesus? That happens in the little things, as well as the big. Following Jesus happens when I clamp my mouth shut when I want to participate in gossip about that person. Following Jesus happens when I respond in grace to my husband, instead of snapping back. Following Jesus happens when I go without the "extras" and the "nice" so that someone else can be given a meal.

"Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for the edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear . . . Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." - Ephesians 4:29, 31-32, NASB 

"Let love be without hypocrisy . . ." - Romans 12:9, NASB

We don't do it for ourselves, for our glory and praise. But for Him and for His.

"'Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.'" - Matthew 5:16, NASB

Open and Honest

I just spent a month in an environment where I didn't have much interaction with fellow followers of Jesus. And to be entirely honest, it was refreshing. Actually, very refreshing.

I interacted with several friends who, although they believe in God, don't necessarily follow Him. And it was these interactions which were refreshing to my soul. It was sweet fellowship. Which I didn't realize could happen. I'm guessing you're beginning to wonder where I'm going with this... 

What I realized in the midst of my time with friends who aren't following Jesus is: They are open and honest. They're not worried about what others are thinking about their life choices, or how they can hide behind religious laws, nor are they bogged down with conforming to others religious ideas just because they don't want to disturb the calm. They are open and honest.

I also realized, I'm usually not open and honest. I hold back. I don't give my all because I fear what others will think of my life choices. I hide behind routine and religious law, instead of wholly embracing the Gospel of Jesus. I'm afraid to disturb the supposed calm around me. I'm not open and honest.

I was faced with sweet fellowship and conviction of heart, because my non-Jesus-following friends are open and honest. They were used of God to impact me. And it made me wonder...

What would happen if the church were more open and honest?

It's Not Because of the Work

I'm not a big birthday person. I'm okay with your birthday and his birthday or her birthday. Just not mine. And it has nothing to do with the fact that a birthday means I'm older. It's all the attention. What are you supposed to do when a group of people sings "Happy Birthday" to you? Opening up presents in front of other people? That's one of my least favorite things to do. And really, it's just my birthday. Frankly, I didn't do anything. My mom did all the work; I was just . . . born.

Mother's Day, on the other hand, I like. Yesterday I celebrated my second Mother's Day (and my little man's first birthday- hooray!). I suppose if you applied my same "anti-birthday" logic to Mother's Day, you'd think I didn't care for this May holiday much either. But it's much different in my mind. Sure, there's attention - but it's not all on me. There are LOTS of people being celebrated on Mother's Day. There's no song in which you sit awkwardly in front of a cake and stack of presents. And Mother's Day - I feel like I earned it. Like it's a day of recognition and appreciation for all I do as a mom. And I think it's a pretty great idea!

I guess, what it all boils down to is this: I didn't work for my birthday, so the love and greetings I receive seem undeserved. But for Mother's Day - yeah, I do a lot of work. So I guess I feel like I deserve to be appreciated and loved. Make sense?

As I was sorting this through in my head last night, I couldn't help but compare my "anti-birthday" and "pro-Mother's Day" stance to God's love and His abundant grace and freely given salvation.

God loves us. But not because of anything we've done. His grace extended towards us is not a payment for deeds completed. Salvation is given not because of the hard work I've put in at the church or the long hours at the food packing facility. I do not work for His love, His grace, His mercy. I am given His love. I am given His grace. I am given His mercy.

He loves us because we are His (Isaiah 43:3-4).
In fact, He loved us when we hated Him (Romans 5:6, 8)
He saved me as a gift. Because of His grace. He gave that which I do not deserve (Ephesians 2:8-9)
Because of His love - not because of anything I have done - I am a child of God (1 John 3:1)

I think that's pretty awesome.

"But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared, He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out upon us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by His grace we would be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life." - Titus 3:4-7 (NASB, emphasis mine)